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March 31, 2004
He said, I said
A poem I wrote today. Posting it here for Lyndsey to read. I mean, who else reads poems other than us? Hell, who else reads the blog? Anyway, I wrote the poem about him. Pretty much he said everything that I claim he did...however I manipulated it to my liking. Inspired by the first line. He was looking at the pictures on my digital camera. He told me he could write a hundred pages on the picture of the tree with the hole in it. He thought it was that deep. So I wrote a poem. Whee.
He said, I said
He said he could write a hundred pages about my picture.
I said I could write a thousand about his eyes.
He said, "There's more to life than living."
I said, "I've long forgotten how to breathe."
He said, "There's so much left to see."
I said, "I've already seen the beauty of the world in you."
He said, "I don't understand people and their silly ways."
I said, "Soon you'll see I'm different than the rest."
He said, "Sometimes I want to slip away."
I said, "I'll catch you if you fall."
Posted by Nikalyn at 11:16 PM | Comments (2)
March 30, 2004
I like him...a lot. Gran
I like him...a lot.
Gran is in the hospital.
Ernest got a little deep today.
I read some nice short stories.
Walden is too much...I downloaded the summary.
I took a few nice pictures.
There's weird black marks on my webcam picture and I'm too non caring and lazy to attempt to figure out where they came from.
I'm really liking Sociology. Even though America is satan.
I'm hoping dad will let me be his slave again for money. Just for a bit.
I need money for a Comp 3 book. But I think I might be able to just download the stories from the internet. Maybe. I found the first three on there.
LYNNNDSEEEEYYY, I LOOOOOVE YOOOOU!!!!
Posted by Nikalyn at 11:44 PM | Comments (3)
March 29, 2004
Yup.
...
Posted by Nikalyn at 02:22 PM | Comments (1)
March 28, 2004
Love is just another word for pain...
(I wrote 2 other entries today if you'd like to go read them first...wha? read my blog? *gasps* who does that? what? but yeah, two other entries...)
Matchbox Romance is rocking my socks right now. They're depressing. I like depressing music when I'm depressed. It's a crazy thing.
Don't be worried. (Not that anyone was...*sigh) I don't want to kill myself. Okay, maybe a little. But I never will. So if I say it just bare with me and let me vent. Maybe throw me some words of niceness or something in there. That's all.
I don't know how I'm getting to Cleveland and the mere thought of not seeing that concert gives me ucky feelings of anger and disappointment.
I will go. I don't know how right now. That's what gets me. The unknown. The fact that I really just don't know.
I'll talk to mom tomorrow? I don't know. She'll probably be asleep when I get home from my night class tomorrow.
Tomorrow = the end of Spring Break. I think it's safe to say that Spring Break officially sucked. What happened to the days of yesteryear when Spring Break was so fun and seemed to last for years? It actually felt like just a week. How disappointing. I suppose it's just me growing up...yeah, that bites.
I found a place that sells flags. The flea market. I think I might get a British flag. Why? I don't know. *shrugs* I've always wanted one. If they had an Ireland one I would get it too. But I don't think they did. I'll go get it next weekend if I have any money left over.
Lyndsey's not home yet. I wish she'd hurry up so I could tell her the plan I made for school tomorrow. We'll drive up together since I need to buy books still and such. We both end at 1:30 so we'll go home together. Hopefully, she'll agree to the dying of my hair when we get home. Then I have that nasty math class at 6. How fun.
I am looking forward to new hair.
Anything to hide my true self I guess.
I'm needy. I want someone to ravish me with love and attention and it never happens. I really think I need a boyfriend. Not a BOYFRIEND. Well, that would be nice too...But really just a boy who's my friend who can flirt with me a little and would compliment me sometimes. I mean, I'm not relying on that or anything. But it would be nice...eh? But like that would ever happen...
I feel artsy. That usually happens when I get sad. I want to take pictures. I can't think of anything to take pictures of.
The dashboard tickets sit and stare at me from their safe home behind my webcam. They taunt me. They whisper to me words of contempt and ridicule. They want me to fail. They don't want to be ripped by the ticket taker. They want to live. I want to live. I want to live through the concert. They want to live by me failing. They hope I don't go. They taunt me.
I'm pretty sure I'm just a little crazy.
I don't even know where my backpack is
Posted by Nikalyn at 11:04 PM | Comments (2)
Yup, it's official
I'm probably going to take a BUNCH of pills and take the big sleep sometime soon.
Not an original method for my demise but oh well.
Feed the penguins for me.
:-/
Posted by Nikalyn at 07:18 PM | Comments (0)
Right, fine, of fucking course.
He refused to take me. Of fucking course. He laughed at me and said no way was he going that far. Like he hasn't drove that far before?! We drove to the damn Cleveland airport over a year ago. Ugh...
I suppose I'll ask my mother. Maybe one of her friends will drive up there and hang with her...maybe.
I would ask Lyndsey if maybe someone in her family would drive us up there but that's really asking a lot...maybe? Maybe Wes and Eric would take us up there but what would they do while we were in the concert? Maybe we could bribe them?
Maybe offer someone money?
I don't know...
I SO don't want to have to sell the damn tickets.
I love Chris. He's the only favorite band I've ever had. No music hits me the way his does. I HAVE to go. I would drive there myself but I know they wouldn't let us. Therefore, they should take us! But it's not working this way...
I don't know. I'll think this out and regroup I suppose.
I'm off for a bath and to drown in my misery.
If you could hit me with a bus I'd be most appreciated...
On the good side, I did get four pairs of rechargeable batteries and a charger. Picture time!
Posted by Nikalyn at 07:08 PM | Comments (0)
March 27, 2004
I really have nothing of
I really have nothing of interest to say right now.
I want to dye my hair but mom hasn't left anywhere.
Loser...
It's Saturday. She should go out.
Lyndsey's looks rocking so far. :)
I wish I could do something to make myself stand out. But it's not going to happen.
I feel blah...
I wish it would go away.
Posted by Nikalyn at 10:59 PM | Comments (0)
March 26, 2004
:*(
I need about 170 dollars for school books...
I'm very, very, very rather depressed.
People don't seem to be making it any better...
Posted by Nikalyn at 03:45 PM | Comments (1)
March 25, 2004
Concrete Evidence
Last night the urge to actually write in a actual journal hit me. I haven't been sleeping well lately so I've had considerable time to think about things. I told myself that in the morn I would drive to the book store and pick me up one of those sketchbook journaly things. Which I did. I had to fight back the urge to also pick up Clay's single but once I saw that the price of a two song cd, one song I already have on a full length cd and the other downloaded on my computer, I quickly pushed that notion out of my head. I also had to push back the desire to buy a swanky watch from Spencer's that I've wanted forever. It was on sale for 13 bucks down from 30. It just seems like such a good deal! But I remembered that the small amount of money in my Hello Kitty wallet was for school books. So I bought a journal for 6 bucks and that was it.
Getting a little inspiration from Rusty's old sketchbook I'm thinking about making it like a scrapbook/journal thing. It doesn't have lines in it or anything so I pretty much can put whatever I want in there. I can't draw or anything but I can write down poetic lines that I compose in my head.
Plus, I can decorate it with stickers and pictures!
See, I'm getting excited already!
No, I just really needed a forum just to be sporadic and random and private. Although, maybe one day I'll have a scanner and scan some of it. Who knows.
I need to go up to the school tomorrow and get an estimate on text books that I can't afford.
And the villagers rejoiced...
Posted by Nikalyn at 06:44 PM | Comments (4)
March 23, 2004
Yeaaaah!
"I'd be lying if I didn't say I'm on the verge of doing Snoopy dances. "
- Mort Rainey aka Johnny Depp from "Secret Window"
I'm glad SOMEONE gets the greatness of Snoopy dances! I used to do it as an action in the LG chat but no one knew what the hell I was doing. YAY! Snoopy dances rock.
"I don't respond well to intimidation. Makes me feel icky. "
- See above quote
I also found that one to be snigger worthy. :D
It was a nice little movie. I like when people die in the end. Great when movies promote insanity and killing and corn!!
Posted by Nikalyn at 11:59 PM | Comments (4)
Where to?
Anyone need a ride? Apparently I'm the god damn taxi service of this family.
I mean, once in awhile it's fine.
But come on! Seriously now, COME ON!
It's my fucking Spring Break for christ's sake!!
Stop taking advantage of my niceness!
Posted by Nikalyn at 01:02 PM | Comments (3)
March 22, 2004
DDDDDDAshboard!
Tickets came today!! YAYAYAYAYAYAYA!!!!
Now all that's needed is a ride...
I have a few ideas...
But...
YAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAAYAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Posted by Nikalyn at 06:57 PM | Comments (0)
YES!
I'm finally getting viagra and propecia comments on my blog again. Oh how I missed you guys!
Anyway, I woke up this morning in an odd state. I wasn't thinking clearly and everything was a big blur. Apparently I needed more sleep. It took me like 2 hours to get motor skills.
I called the school regarding the fact that they demanded me to fill out a paper that I already gave them and give them my mom's tax form which once again I already gave them. Got transferred twice. Finally after bitching to the man about how I didn't want to fill out another damn piece of paperwork without seeing results, he told me that he had really no idea why they sent that paper to me.
So ha! They admitted they were wrong! Mwhahaha. THE MAN admitted wrongdoing! MWHAHAHA
They said that my awards letter should be coming shortly. Yeah! Money! :D I doubt it will come in time for Spring quarter though. Oh well, one more quarter to scrape for book money shouldn't be that bad.
Loki has cat hair all over my black stripey shirt and jingley pants. Damn her!
Posted by Nikalyn at 04:13 PM | Comments (0)
March 21, 2004
You're my favorite damn disease
Depression gripped me. Still does. You wouldn't leave my mind last night.
I tossed and turned. Your image flooded my head, your voice pounded in my ears. I couldn't sleep.
You make me sad. Indirectly that is. I mean, it's not your fault. You don't do a thing wrong. It's stupid me, of course.
I just get sad because I'll never see you with my own eyes, touch you with these fragile fingers, taste you with these poison filled lips. It's very disconcerting. An eventual turn of events that never seemed to bother me until recently.
I like you. I'm not sure if I can be in love with someone who lives in the dark. But if that's possible...then I'm pretty much in love with you. It's crazy.
I knew from the moment I saw you that I had to know you. And now that I do, you'd think it would be enough to quench of my thirst of you. But it's not...every day it grows stronger and more urgent.
I'm sad. You're too damn good for me. I want to be a better person for you...but I'm not sure how to start. But what I really want is for you to notice me, to see me like I see you.
This is why I've been depressed the last two days. This is why it will probably continue on...
Everytime I shut my eyes I see you. The last words from my lips is your name as I wish that one day our paths will cross. You run through my head every moment of every god damn day.
It's fucking depressing. And of course, it will stay that way. No one I love ever loves me back.
I love you. You're the most beautiful creature I've ever seen...ever want to see. You're perfect in every way, even when you're not. I could live the rest of my life content being one of your followers.
Posted by Nikalyn at 10:59 PM | Comments (0)
March 20, 2004
Waltz for the Moon
Final Fantasy track. When Squall and Rinoa are dancing. Such greatness!
Anyway, since I'm doing absolutely nothing tonight I figured I should do something constructive and blog a bit. The past few days I've been helping Rusty with his live camera and I also introduced him to IRC. The live cam seems to be running smoothly today. I watched a bit of Final Fantasy Crystal Chronicles and then some British tv. It's damn windy in England. Also there was a body found at Newstead Abbey. And someone got hit by a train! And the news lady has HUGE BOOBS!
Did you know tomorrow's Mother's Day in England? Who fucking knew? I never knew Mother's Day was on different days around the world...I guess that's just my ignorance showing but I found it interesting. The news was wishing people a Happy's Mother's Day tomorrow so I questioned Rusty about it. It reminded him that he needed to get his mom something so off he went. When he came back he said that the wind had knocked a piece of his house off and it fell right where his car would have been. Lucky his car wasn't there at the time! I saved the car! If it wasn't for me reminding Rusty of Mother's Day then he wouldn't have left and his car would have gotten hit. I'm like a guardian angel! Or a super hero!
He called me a freak.
But he's a bigger one.
Someone had to be cool and is rocking out at Rock City. So here I sit. Bored. No Rusty cam to watch. Damn loser. Had to be cool and actually leave the house. Who does that??
I guess I'll try to get something accomplished. Burn some cds. I would clean but that takes way too much effort. Thinking of playing Suikoden since I can't play Kingdom Hearts without Lyndsey but I really don't remember what I was doing on it.
There's so many games that I wish would hurry their asses up and come out. Kingdom Hearts 2, Suikoden IV, Two different Wild Arms, whoo whee! Gaming goodness!
I think the FF XII guy looks like Tidus. I'm not too impressed with how the characters look yet. Oh well. I miss FF's. I'm sure I'll give it a chance.
Loki's way too friendly today. Crazy kitten. I just put on a new black shirt and already its covered in kitty hair. Glad I'm not going anywhere.
Well...guess I'll go entertain myself.
Posted by Nikalyn at 05:34 PM | Comments (3)
March 18, 2004
Bad me
Okay, I have my last final today...actually my only actual test final. I don't care about it. It's my dumb math class so it should be cake. Plus she's giving us all the formula's to use. So...I don't care about it.
But here's the bad part. I am so fucking craving McDonald's cheese burger that it's not funny. I was thinking "How's the fastest way of getting money for cheese burgers?" But then I realized I have money from selling my books back. I had 61 bucks but Lynz borrowed I think 25 or so for her license yesterday. So I have like forty bucks. Even though I need the money for books...this is the plan of tonight...
Go fill car up with gas.
Go eat McDonalds.
All of this before class today.
Yes, this is leaving me short of money for books but then again, I probably couldn't buy one book with 61 bucks anyways. After Lynz pays me back I'll probably have like 40 again...maybe I could buy the little literature books with it...
I'm hoping that my financial aid goes through before then...yeah, wishful thinking I guess. But if not between mom and my bank account we're gonna have to scrape up money. Ick.
But already decided on gas and McDonald's. Yup.
Posted by Nikalyn at 02:15 PM | Comments (0)
Squalled
Wanna see my man? Click below. Big pictures, lots of them. But guess what? I have cable...I really don't care anymore. lol.
He's so gorgeous. I wish he were real.
The last one is probably my favorite. Found by Lyndsey today. Yay!!
I have dirtier ones but...I guess I'll keep it rated PG -13 here. :)
Posted by Nikalyn at 02:45 AM | Comments (0)
March 17, 2004
Claiken!
I love Clay. I may just have to marry him...or rape him...or both...
Or smother him in chocolate sauce and nibble him...
*coughs*
*coughs*
....
....
....
What?
I'd never talk about a Christian boy that way...
....
....
Or would I?
....
....
Mmm...Clayness...
*molest, molest*
Posted by Nikalyn at 09:42 PM | Comments (2)
I love you either outcome!
I love you either outcome! Be happy! I LOVE YOU!!!
*dances around you*
Posted by Nikalyn at 10:28 AM | Comments (5)
March 16, 2004
I just downloaded the first
I just downloaded the first cd of the Final Fantasy 8 soundtrack in under an hour. Wow. That's some good shit...
Okay, now I'll burn it to a cd and move on to the next cd. :)
I may have became addicted.
Posted by Nikalyn at 08:53 PM | Comments (5)
300 dollars of car repair
300 dollars of car repair work on the way for Elijah in the morning.
*coughs* Elijah's the car *coughs*
Poor lil boy will be all better tomorrow.
Hoo-ray! (Cartman voice) It sounds funny in my head. Believe me.
I have to finish my Brit lit journals tonight and take those in tomorrow when I sell back my books. Then school will be all done! Hoo-ray!
Good luck on the license test tomorrow Lyndsey honey! I LOVE YOU!!! YOU ROCK!!!!
Posted by Nikalyn at 03:47 PM | Comments (0)
March 15, 2004
I want.
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=3280988396&category=13667
They probably don't sell FF soundtracks anywhere around here do they...?
I would download it. But it's four discs and I can't find a single song! GRRRRR!
I don't even have a page written on my paper yet. It's gonna be a long night folks.
Posted by Nikalyn at 10:42 PM | Comments (8)
Annoyances
I just spent the last 3 hours sitting in a mechanics office waiting for my car to be fixed. What was wrong with it you ask? Nothing much...at least at that point.
I took it there to get a simple oil change and new brakes. My real reason for taking it there was I wanted to get rid of the horrible SQUEAK that happens whenever my car goes over a bump or hit the brakes. Of course, they said the problem was I needed new brakes.
After 3 hours of sitting there...mingling with old folks...watching a horrible 1930's looking gansta movie...checking out the semi hot mechanic that I used to lust over in like 9th grade...it was done.
106 some dollars later...it still fucking SQUEAKS.
I mean, apparently yes I needed new brakes but they didn't fix the problem I came in there for. We went back about 10 minutes later and they said come back tomorrow.
So annoyed. I just want my car to stop squeaking. It's quite embarassing. It's not just a little sqeak. It's a full blown SQUEAK.
So...have to go back there tomorrow to have it looked at AGAIN.
Oh yeah, they also informed me I need: new tires, some kind of belt that pretty much runs the entire car, and whatever the heck that's making it squeak.
Fun.
So annoyed. I wanted to stab myself in the head after it was done. All that and the problem wasn't even solved...or hell no one knows what the problem is.
Oh...and I still have to write two essays tonight and finish journals. Lovely stuff.
Posted by Nikalyn at 05:46 PM | Comments (4)
March 13, 2004
Be gentle
That's what one of our mild taco sauce packets said to me last night. Those packets are directed at the easily amused. I tried to take a picture but the writing won't show up on it. :-/
Got my SAR in the mail today. No, I did not contract SARS. My Student Aid Report. No idea what the fuck to do with it beyond fill out the verification papers that the uni sent me. I'll fill them out this weekend and take them up Monday and throw them at them. Those fucks can figure it out because I'm fucking sick of dealing with paperwork and seeing no results.
All I want is the government's money, is that so much to ask?
I need to finish Brit Lit stuff. I'm bored of writing papers. I wish it was next quarter already.
I'm thinking about cleaning up the computer today. Transfer Lyndsey's stuff to her computer and delete some of my files that I don't need. Not sure if I'll get around to doing that though.
I had a dirty dream about Rusty last night. Shush. Don't tell him. :-X
Posted by Nikalyn at 03:42 PM | Comments (6)
My heart yearns for things it can't have
I've never been so drawn, so mesmerized by someone before. I could spend hours in your presence. You're so intriguing. You're the perfect man. At least to me. We have so much in common. I wish you could see this as well. You're too good for me I fear. And I'm like this fan girl who worships you.
Can someone be in love with someone if they don't reciprocate? If that's possible then I'm a little past the point of being in love with you.
You don't believe in love.
I think you're the most beautiful creature on Earth...
Posted by Nikalyn at 12:31 AM | Comments (0)
March 12, 2004
How freaking sweet
It make me smile.
Regarding the ocean:
Bleed our Hearts [The Dead] says:
I suppose so. I would rather just sit and watch it. Especially at night.
Bleed our Hearts [The Dead] says:
Although it usually depresses me
Bleed our Hearts [The Dead] says:
cause I feel really alone
Foofy D.S. says:
That's how I used to feel at first...
Foofy CS says:
But then I dunno.
Foofy CS says:
I guess this sounds really "new age" or that crap, but well, it just seemed so real and I was like "well if it likes me what can i lose?"
Foofy CS says:
But you know I'm weird.
Bleed our Hearts [The Dead] says:
awww
Bleed our Hearts [The Dead] says:
yeah.
Bleed our Hearts [The Dead] says:
i always felt really small by it though. so it made me feel really sad. I felt alone.
Foofy CS says:
Yeah. Well that's why I liked it because it made me not feel alone.
Foofy CS says:
You know like how sometimes you're shy that like someone you love has lots of friends?
Foofy CS says:
But secretly you're happy because you're connected to all those friends somehow, through that person?
Foofy CS says:
Well that's kinda what the ocean does to me. I guess it means different things to different people. But that's what's amazing about it.
Bleed our Hearts [The Dead] says:
hehe yeah. see I think it's beautiful. but it's that sad kind of beautiful.
Foofy CS says:
Someday we three will go to the beach together and you won't be sad because we'll all be together.
Bleed our Hearts [The Dead] says:
awww.
Bleed our Hearts [The Dead] says:
thats a nice thought
Bleed our Hearts [The Dead] says:
that makes me happy
How cute. :)
Posted by Nikalyn at 03:39 AM | Comments (0)
I really dislike Missy Elliot
I really dislike Missy Elliot
Posted by Nikalyn at 02:45 AM | Comments (1)
March 11, 2004
Hate rising.
One day I'll wake up to a world without me doing dishes...
Or at least I won't be the only one to do them.
I mean, I could NOT do them but then mom will get pissed again...just like Tuesday.
I really loathe doing dishes.
On the plus side...no more school. Besides math.
Posted by Nikalyn at 05:15 PM | Comments (0)
March 10, 2004
Ackers
I'm pretty sure tomorrow is my last Interpersonal Communication class. Good. I hate that woman. I hope I never see her again in my time at that school. I have to turn in my final paper and give my informal oral report and then I should be done. What fun.
If we get through all our oral reports in Comp 2 then tomorrow will also be our last class. However, we have a large class so I'm not sure if it will happen.
I still have a few Brit Lit classes to go. I need to finish my journals but now I'm a little depressed since I wrote a few entries and can't find them. I probably threw them away. But you'd think I wouldn't be that stupid...yeah, you'd think.
I think I have two more classes of math. Glad about that. So sick of that lady as well. I've never hated my teachers in college before this quarter. It's so sad.
American Idol has seemed to lost its appeal with me. There's no one I like and a about 5 people I hate. The others I couldn't give a shit about. I miss Clay. Ruben still fucking sucks.
I can't wait to see Chris again. I loved every minute of that concert. He's so gorgeous. I love how he means and feels every word he sings. There's so much emotion. I absolutely adore him. He's amazing.
Well...back to Brit Lit journals I guess.
<3 you.
Posted by Nikalyn at 10:37 PM | Comments (2)
March 09, 2004
Whoa...
Did you see that Internet? It's going FAST!
I'm dizzy!!!
Posted by Nikalyn at 08:58 PM | Comments (10)
March 08, 2004
If you're a smart kid, stay the hell away from love
Downloading the newest Thrice cd. In preparation of the concert. I'm so uber excited! Can't even begin to tell you that!! I love Lyndsey for trudging along to DC concerts with me. I know next time Orgy comes around we'll be going to that as well!
So...let's see...lots of things to say.
The moment we've all been waiting for a LONG, LONG time. Cable internet will be installed on the computers tomorrow afternoon. How excited are we? Pretty damn so! Lyndsey got a computer from her aunt so we're gonna network them together. With school approaching for both of us, it was necessary to have two computers down here.
What the hell will I do with high speed internet...? I'll go nuts I think.
I cleaned a lot of the basement so the cable guy can get to the computers. I didn't touch a lot of Lyndsey's stuff so I figured that tomorrow she can straight her stuff and maybe vaccum down here...it SO needs it. I didn't touch my room...it seems everytime I clean this room I get worn out before I do my room. :(
Lots of cool things were bought today. Most of which were necessary. Lyndsey bought a little computer desk and a chair and computery stuff from Walmart. She also bought some CD's so I can burn cds. :)
We then hit the mall where we bought a few movies. Lyndsey got a Chaplin movie. I got Alice in Wonderland with the real people. I love that version. :) We bought some pjs. Mine are Hello Kitty and Lyndsey got Strawberry Shortcake and Carebears. I LOVE my pjs. The shirt is a little small from my boobs...but it's okay. I can still wear it. I just have to wear it when I'm not doing much because it lifts up to show my stomach. No one wants to see that. Lyndsey also bought me the penguin slippers. Yes, they are about 5 sizes too small. Yes, I still am wearing them. :D So cute!
We also got shoes. The same pair. lol. They were actually the ones I wanted awhile back but they were on sale today. We bought shoes strings so we can be different. But we really did need shoes...so we did a good thing.
A large pink Bruce and shadowed Gelert were also bought. Just because they were uber cute! I love Lyndsey's Gelert. It's so damn fluffy!
We were going to get cell phones today. I really need one in case something happens in my car. We had everything wrote up and the plan ready until the guy turned to us and said "Oh, there will be a 8 hundred dollar down payment."
WHAT? EIGHT HUNDRED DOLLARS?
Are we buying a boat? A car? A trained circus monkey?
No!
For 800 dollars we could buy half the god damn phones in the store!
That's just fucking ridiculous. I think the guy was trying to fuck with us because we were teenage girls. Needless to say, we won't be buying that man's services. Hopefully, we can find a plan that works out for us. I tried to call my dad today to see if he really couldn't add people to his plan but he didn't answer...nor call back. I still do have Jim's phone so if necessary I could use that one and just have it reactivated...that may save Lyndsey some money.
Well, I think that's it...
I need to go do some homework. Later.
Posted by Nikalyn at 11:45 PM | Comments (5)
DC!!!
Lyndsey was nice enough to give me her credit card stuffs so I pre ordered my tickets off ticketmaster!!
Yay!
However, being the idiot I am...I accidently typed the wrong address. Instead of "Elizabeth" street I accidently typed "Elizabath" street. They make you type all your info in SO fucking fast that I didn't even notice it. I sure hope it still comes. I've had some mail much more fucked up than that and it still came.
If it doesn't...then I will be majorly pissed. Not only that I'm not going to the concert but because I would have wasted Lyndsey's money. I'm so freaking annoyed. I sure hope it still comes!
Katy (who's mom works at the post office) and mom both said it should still come.
I don't know how we'll get to Cleveland...but we'll get there! I'll make sure of it!! Even if we have to pay someone to take us there. :D
There's enough relatives and such between the two of us that we can find someone...lol.
I can't wait. I LOVE CHRIS! I LOVE THRICE!!
And you know what concerts mean...NEW MERCHANDISE!!
Oh by the way...CABLE INTERNET TOMORROW. OH YEAH BABY.
AND LOTS OF FUCKING COOL STUFF WE GOT TODAY.
I'M IN SUCH A DAMN GOOD MOOD ABOUT EVERYTHING.
:D
Posted by Nikalyn at 08:04 PM | Comments (1)
DASHBOARD!!!!!!!!
DASHBOARD TOUR! DASHBOARD TOUR!!!
Cleveland or Cincinnati! Wonder which one would be closer...
Ha! Go to both! lmao.
I want to call Lyndsey so bad to tell her!!! I don't know the number though!!
SO FUCKING EXCITED!!!
We're buying these bitches as soon as possible! I WILL NOT MISS THIS TOUR!!!
Posted by Nikalyn at 05:26 PM | Comments (0)
March 07, 2004
I'm falling into memories of you and things we used to do...
I wore my Clay shirt today. I not only spilled cherry coke on it. But also hot dog sauce.
I'm the hugest klutz.
I felt a little cool wearing it though. :)
Mom wanted some jeans so we went to Gabe's. They didn't have anything good though. Blah.
We went to the mall, to Goody's, and bought some clothes. I found ALOT of stuff there I wanted. They have the cutest pj's. Hello Kitty, and Rainbow Bright, and Care Bears. I wanted the Hello Kitty ones! They also had these khaki pants that were kinda army like...but since they were clearance they only had one pair. They also had like three hoodies kinda like Lyndsey's black orgy one...but the only ones they had were small. I got one pair of regular jeans and a mega cute pair of black pants! I LOVE them.
And! And! You're not ready for it....! I also got a "I heart nerds" shirt! Eeep! I do heart nerds! :D I LOVE IT! I remember they had small ones at Fashion Bug one time but this one was a large. Yay!
As we were leaving I realized they had penguin slippers! ONE pair of penguin slippers. ON SALE! But mom wouldn't buy them for me. I hid them in hopes that if Lyndsey and I go to the mall sometime this week they might still be there.
I've been listening to "Ocean Avenue" by Yellowcard on repeat for the whole day. It makes me happy. Not sure why. If I had blank cds (Another thing I need to get next time I go out) I would burn just this song on a cd. It's one of those songs I'd love to blast with the windows down.
I'm almost done with my Comp paper. Almost.
I hope Lyndsey brings me home lots of yummy foods.
Posted by Nikalyn at 07:30 PM | Comments (0)
If I could find you
If I could find you now...
Things would get better.
We could leave this town and run forever.
I know somewhere, somehow we'll be together...
Let your waves crash down on me and take me away.
Posted by Nikalyn at 12:39 PM | Comments (0)
March 06, 2004
Why do I always feel
Why do I always feel I'm missing out on everything...?
I often wish I'd wake up one morning and I'd be a completely different person.
Right, I'm so amazing. Then why does only one person know that?
Sometimes, I just want to give up.
Sometimes, I want to ruin it all.
Posted by Nikalyn at 05:54 PM | Comments (2)
Drivin' Dangerously
My mother got her oil changed today. I went with her because I was already in the car when she had to go there. She started talking about how she needs new brakes. Her?! She needs new brakes?! Has ANYONE heard mine? They squeak over every bump, every hole, every squish of the pedal I make! The nice looking man who worked there overheard this and proceeded to tell me how dangerous that is and that if they're squeeking this bad it means that they're probably wore down VERY far and in dire need of changing.
Yes, I have told them this for months.
Why has no one got me new ones yet? Do they not value their daughter's life? I'm gonna die I tell you. One day my brakes will just NOT stop and I will get in a wreck. Who's gonna feel bad then? Huh?
I'll attempt to call my dad sometime this week and see what he says. Although, I do feel bad the only time I call is to have him do things for me...well, he's the one trying to shove me out of his life...not me...he should at least provide for me.
Lyndsey bought me some batteries so I'm gonna take some pictures soon. I'm a little disappointed it's rainy today. I really would like some green springy pics. I may just go drive around and look for something to snap a pic of.
My Clay shirt finally came on Friday. I haven't wore it yet because I haven't left the house really. When I wear it I'll make sure to take pictures of it for you guys. It actually is an iron on so I'm hoping it doesn't fall off during washings. I do like it a lot though! I can't wait to wear it around. :D
Posted by Nikalyn at 04:20 PM | Comments (1)
March 05, 2004
Drunken mess?
Dude, flipping past Jay Leno after watching Mad, Mad house on Sci fi...Christina Ricci is currently on there being interviewed and I am watching. It needs not be said that I dislike her muchly. No, that's already established. But man, she sounds SO fucking drunk right now...she is stoned or something. She's all giddy and acting like she is high and everything is right in the world...She's seriously drunk...
Swear to God.
She also sounds like a total idiot.
People need to monitor what celebrities say before they go on talk shows...
Posted by Nikalyn at 12:16 AM | Comments (4)
March 04, 2004
Gorgeous
He's beautiful eh?
I saw him singing with the guy from REM today. He's amazing.
I can't wait for a concert.
I was gonna pay my registration fees while I was up at the college tomorrow taking Lyndsey in for placement tests but I doubt mom will give me money.
Yeah right...like that that's gonna happen.
It's past 12 and I haven't even seen her tonight.
Fuck. Might as well just not go to school.
Posted by Nikalyn at 10:22 PM | Comments (2)
Growl
3. Count them, 3 UPS trucks were seen enroute to school today and one was seen on the way home.
This had to be a sign of my shirt arriving in the mail, eh?
Fuck no.
God has a funny way of fucking with me.
Posted by Nikalyn at 04:43 PM | Comments (1)
March 03, 2004
US Postal Service are evil
I want my god damn Clay Aiken shirt and boy am I not kidding.
I have way too much homework to do. I have two research papers to do today. Usually not a problem but I have to keep switching back and forth from APA style to MLA style. It's beginning to become a hassle. And mighty confusing.
I'm hungry. I want Subway. If I had money I'd go buy a sub when I pick up Lyndsey.
My Rusty boy honored me greatly today as he played with one of my photos that I took.
He's so amazing.
Posted by Nikalyn at 01:32 PM | Comments (3)
March 02, 2004
The boy had your face
Every once in awhile I think about you. For a few seconds I wonder how it would be if we were still together and things worked out the way I always thought they would. I miss you sometimes. I miss just hearing your voice. I really wish you missed me.
I saw a boy today who looked like you. I did a double take. I'd seen him before and commented to myself about the resemblance...but today it just seemed different.
I have to be honest, I'm lonely. I only get like this when I am.
I want someone to look at me the way you did.
I want someone like you...but different.
A piece of my heart will always belong to you...even though you don't want it.
I blame this on him. He has to be so completely compatible with me and I'm too chicken and self loathing to even try anything.
Today we sat and talked about Angel. A boy...who watches Angel...besides Rusty. LoL. Loving it!
I told him I absolutely love Wesley. He said Wesley is his favorite character. He said Wesley reminded him of himself. I told him I'd be his Fred...if she wasn't all possessed.
I don't know...I need confidence. I need to just ask him to go do something or ask him if he has instant messenger. Something to move the relationship further.
Maybe he'd say yes?
He's so geeky and gorgeous.
I have two classes next quarter to make him see how great I am.
Posted by Nikalyn at 09:48 PM | Comments (1)